esse quam videri

you were vast unto others

i’ve been reading this everyday like some sort of affirmation:

date the paper—it’s your early work—

date the space— it’s late—

write—be late with you—

write to get lost in the day—get

the time from friends—make them a 

memorable meal and forget what you made

—write— we are tasting new peaches

—all the time—write you waste

nothing—write nothing is wasted on

you—

write this time of the animals—the space

of the animals—write the dog who

stands on your foot and leans in— write

how you lean in— when you love —

write the gentleness there—

write what you said to me— how far

you went away from yourself— when you

stopped—-noticing — write you lost

your way for a reason — write how —

you come back — how your body was not

made to do this — with you in it —

write stay in it — a little longer —

write what died for this space — and

only what will live in it —

tell me where you’ve been necessary —

the memory in the snow— the river

in light — write you flow — humanly —

write the precise points that touch 

the rivers of energy in the body —

enter them — and tell me — if they are

still wet — tell me — where they’ve been

— tell me — who touched you all winter —

tell me who — you’ll remember — in

spring —

write where you were chosen — when you

were chosen — write — what calmness

was chosen in you — write it on your

hand — write — you are not too old to

write on your hand — write — there’s 

still space there — and you have been

in it —

how you unsettle me — how you go

infinite — how you come back —

write how our nature’s getting a lot

done — how the air gets fresh all over

us — write what tender leaves are back

— how they tassle and sway — write you

are spring — write — you— are 

impossible —

write how you slouch over flowers and

mend things — write — you can’t

remember what you planted — but that

you’re certain some of them are

volunteers — write today — even the

garbage smells good — write it’s

spring — new york — and you’re not

done with me yet —

write — how you spill everything today —

feel listless and berate yourself —

write — leave yourself alone — write

you are the laziest girl in town — be

that girl — once in a while — write

it was once plants and horses here —

write what you awoke to — the feeling

inside the thing you made — how you were 

happy there — write — be there

write the day — you were here —

write the day you were most yourself

— write— I can thank you for that —

write you went the beautiful way —

you made time — you knew how to get

things done and it touched everyone

here at least once —

write how your friend’s yard — contains

a tulip tree — that looks like a

voluptuous girl falling out of a pink

dress — write she said that — and it

pleased you — write how easy it is —

to do that — write how you love your

friends — and what they think —

to say — write that’s you in the corner

pale green and fragrant — write your

friend said that — about a girl named

melanie — write how he included you —

how you are — in the world —

write the dog — pausing to shake —

the girl leaning in to smell that page 

—the library — the river in light —

what you’re choosing —the view from

the window — every window — you are

choosing— now

write the body of the house shines

around the house — and you my friend —

were beyond —

you were ballast —

you were vast unto others —

—jen bervin